When someone suffers an acute illness or a severe accident, they rarely just go to one doctor for treatment. Instead, they build an entire support network of doctors, nurses, therapists, and more to help them heal and get back to health. The same thing goes for addiction recovery. We cannot simply expect to go to treatment, then go home and be 100%. It takes a whole team of people to help us through treatment and onto the recovery path, and then we need another team of people to help us to stay in recovery. This team is our support network. But how do we build a support network in recovery?
Learning About Being Supported
One of the first lessons of recovery is that we cannot do this alone. Many have tried, and most have failed. Allowing others to support us as we heal is actually an important part of the recovery process. We learn that we are valuable enough to be supported, and we also learn that others are blessed for supporting us.
Asking for help is not shameful; it is vulnerable and honest, and empowering to both parties. Learning that we can rely on another human being is a lesson that is also valuable, especially when we realize that we may actually have the power to help others too. Sharing one another’s burdens is an advanced skill in the human experience, one that requires empathy, sacrifice, and love. Allowing others to give us those things allows all of us to become better people.
The Different People in Our Support Network
As we learn to ask others for support in our healing, we may find different types of people we can rely on in different ways. The roles that they play within our recovery vary based on who they are and their relationship with us. Some of these may include:
- The “Call At Any Hour” People – These are the people who are on speed dial on our phone. They may be a relative, a sponsor, or just a really, really good friend who knows us and loves us, and understands that cravings come at all hours of the day and night. Others might describe these people as the kind of people who would take a bullet for us. They are loyal, patient, empathetic, and loving. Everyone needs to have someone they feel like they can call at any hour.
- The “I’ve Been There, I Can Help” People – Also mandatory are the people who have been through treatment, are in recovery, and they truly “get it.” They know what it is like to have abused substances, and they know what it takes to get on the road to recovery. They also know what it takes to stay in recovery, so their support is invaluable. These people could be staff at treatment centers, sponsors, other people from recovery meetings, or just other human beings in recovery.
- The Friends – Friendship is also an invaluable part of the human experience. There are many levels of friendship, from those who are simply people who are friendly to us and know our names, to those who know everything about us, and everyone in between. The only requirement of friendship is that they care about us. Therefore, they are powerful to our recovery. Friends are the family that we choose.
- The Family – Family are the people who have to love us, because we share so much in common. The saying “blood is thicker than water” is true, but it also includes people who may not actually be blood-related, but are related through adoption or other family ties. These are the people who have seen us at our very worst and love us in spite of that. Hopefully, they are the type of family who love us, no matter what. They can make a crucial difference in our recovery.
- The Professionals – These are the people whose job it is to support us: doctors, nurses, therapists, recovery staff, and more. But just because it is their job, that doesn’t mean they don’t also care about us. The boundaries are just different, as we should not be calling them at any hour, etc. However, most people who work in the recovery field are very invested in our success as human beings.
These are the people in our support network. They may have different relationships to us, different boundaries, but they all have one common goal: our wellness. This is what building a support network is all about.
How do I build a support network in recovery? First, you must learn what it means to be supported. Then you must learn that you are worthy of that support, that you offer others the opportunity of being supportive, and that by supporting you, they are also improving as a human being. Then you must find people who can fulfill the various needs and roles within your support network. Rancho Milagro Recovery is the first piece of your support network. Call us at (951) 526-4582 today to find out just how supportive and wonderful our staff are, and how committed we are to your recovery. Every client who comes through our doors is important to us as a fellow human being, as someone who is worthy of recovery. We can help you build your support network. Call us today.