These days it seems that just about everything is labeled self-care: from getting a massage to doing the laundry. Truthfully, anything we do that addresses our emotional, mental, or physical needs are acts of self-care. When we think of self-care, we may equate it with taking care of ourselves but this is only half true. While self-care does imply taking care of yourself, it also implies going out of the way to bring yourself joy.
Approaches to Self-Care
Different things bring different people joy. You may shudder at the thought of folding laundry all day but someone else might find deep comfort in doing so — there lies the distinction between taking care and self-care. Self-care is doing the things you love to do and doing them because you love yourself. For some people that means taking a cruise around Alaska and others may practice self-care by drinking their favorite tea at breakfast. Everyone finds joy in different things and for this reason, the world of self-care is constantly being explored. There is no “right” way of self-care but there are “wrong” ones.
What Self-Care Isn’t
Self-care is not engaging in activities that will bring you momentary peace or satisfaction but hurt you later on. This means that abusing substances or alcohol is not self-care, spending money you don’t have is not self-care, and binge eating is not self-care. If the activity you’ve chosen to do has ultimately negative results, then that activity is not self-care. These things may make us feel good but eventually, they result in pain and hardship. The point of self-care isn’t just bringing yourself joy but also ensuring that you are nurturing yourself. When we decide to make choices that we know will hurt us later on (even if they don’t in the present moment) we are choosing self-harm, not self-care.
Engaging in Self-Care
So everything can be self-care… except for the things that can’t… and now you need to navigate the options and find a type of self-care that may work for you. Start simple by identifying some things that you enjoy — they can be broad things like music, animals, or art. Even if you’ve never done some of them, list activities that are related to those things. Once you have those activities written down, you have a resource to get started. Consider which ones you’ve already done and enjoyed doing, which ones you may want to try, and which ones you’re not interested in. As you’re crossing off options on your list, remember to reflect on the long-term outcomes of any activities you’ve listed and how accessible they may be to you. By the end of all of your brainstorming, you will hopefully have a hearty list of activities you can do to perform self-care. If not, never fear! There are plenty of options for self-care that may have nothing to do with someone’s interests.
The Little Things
These unaffiliated activities that can help us to love and nurture ourselves are the little things. Small acts of seemingly random self-care can uplift us and change the course of even the worst of days. Some of the little things we do to practice self-care may not be obvious to us at first. However, recognizing them helps to implement them in the future and make their benefits more apparent. For example, you may be someone who takes lightning-fast showers but, now and then, you allow yourself a little while longer under the warm water. Those extra moments in the shower are, in fact, self-care! You may not realize it as it’s happening, but deciding to allow yourself a small amount of extended comfort is a way to care for yourself. The same goes for hitting the snooze button
— as long as you wake up eventually — or waking up five minutes early to enjoy your morning. Other little things could be going through the drive-thru on an exhausting day, taking a walk because something about the weather just made you want to go outside, or turning on your favorite movie just because you want to.
When to Practice Self-Care
It might not always be clear to us when we’ve earned or needed a break. Knowing when to dive into self-care can be difficult but if our self-care practices are healthy, then there’s no reason not to engage in them whenever we have the opportunity! You may be having a wonderful day with not a worry in the world but that doesn’t mean you can’t practice self-care and show yourself more love. It’s on the hard days where it can be more difficult to know when to pause for ourselves. On days where everything seems to be falling apart, there may not be an opportunity to break for self-care. Sometimes we may have to wait until the day is over or even longer before being able to do anything that may bring some joy. These are the times when having self-care options that you know you can turn to becomes important. When the long-awaited moment of self-care finally arrives, you’ll know what to do and how to do it and will be able to grant yourself relief. Having your own list of options for self-care is self-care in itself!
Seeing to all of your physical, mental, and emotional needs can be difficult, especially when trying to battle other stressors and hardships. Self-care can be a great way to nurture and love ourselves but sometimes it may not be enough. If you are struggling with addiction and find yourself overwhelmed and unable to find relief, Rancho Milagro can help. You can reach us at (951) 526-4582. Rancho Milagro is an addiction treatment facility located in the secluded hills of Temecula, CA. We offer various kinds of therapy including art, nature, and massage as well as individual therapy. Our ranch is home to miles of private trails and over 20 farm and therapy animals that you will have access to. Here, we treat the whole person — mind, body, and spirit. At Rancho Milagro, you will find a community that is committed not only to your recovery but to you as an individual.