It can be difficult to stay motivated every single day for the best of us. When we are in active addiction, finding the reason for living becomes more difficult. Particularly when there is shame, guilt, and our self-esteem lowers as our lives spiral out of our control, it is easier than not to just want to give up. However, every human being has a life worth living, even if it may not always feel that way. The challenge is finding our own purpose, the thing that keeps us here, even in our most difficult moments. Why is my life worth living?
The Question Only We Can Answer
There are people all around us who could find many reasons for us to stay, even in our lowest moments. That support is important, but at the end of the day, the reason our life is worth living is a question that only we can answer. This one has to come from within us if it is going to stick and be that glimmer of light in our darkest hours.
The People Who Love Us
One of the things we sometimes forget is how much other people love us. Even when we hurt them, they see things in us that we may not. They support us in good times and in bad, even if they may lose some faith as our behaviors cause harm to ourselves or others, especially those we love. Those who love us will always be able to find something redeeming in us, even if it is difficult to maintain a relationship with us in active addiction.
Sometimes, the people who love us have to walk away from us. Our addiction may impact them and our relationship with them enough that they can no longer be in our lives. But even if everyone in our lives has walked away from us, it does not mean that we are worthless. It simply means that they love themselves and us enough to know that enabling our behaviors is not healthy for either of us. Not healthy is different than not worthy. Each of us is always worthy of the love of other people. Each of us is always worthy of loving ourselves, no matter what we have done.
The Things We Are Good At
Every person has something unique to contribute to this world. Everyone. Whether we are sober or in active substance use, we still have value, we still have something unique to bring to this world. Sometimes, we judge ourselves based on the achievements of others. When someone builds a magnificent structure, creates a stunning work of art, or provides a solution to feed hungry children, their achievements are obvious to the world. But does that mean that when we get out of bed, show up for work, or call a friend who needs us that these achievements are any less? No. They are different. Not less than.
Everyone has something to contribute, something that we are good at. For someone struggling with addiction, getting out of bed every day against all odds is our gift, something we are good at. There are people for whom that is easy and there are people who cannot get out of bed every day. Comparisons with others are toxic and we need to look at the things we are good at, the things we can do which are unique, the things we can do that bring joy to ourselves and others. We all have these things, we just need to find them.
Finding the Reason
By doing a self-inventory of our strengths and weaknesses and being completely honest with ourselves, we can find the things we are good at. Maybe we are good at making others smile. Maybe we are good at math. The things that we are good at are a unique set of skills, but what we are looking for is that one reason that we have to stay when all else seems lost. Something we can contribute to the world. Whether it be a skill or a relationship, we can find the reason.
Some of us stay for others, like a child, a spouse or partner, a parent, sibling, or friend. People are a great reason to stay when the darkness falls. Because in staying for them, we are staying for us. We are staying because of our relationship with them because we love them and they love us. They love us because they know things about us that are unique and special and loveable. They love us because we are worth it. We are worth it. Against all odds, against our deepest shame. Our life is living because we are worth it.
Why is your life living? Every single person has a life worth living. You are a life worth living. Whether or not you believe that you are worth it, you are. You mean something to someone, and you should also mean something to yourself. By inventorying the people who love you and the things that you are good at, you can find many reasons to stay when all hope seems lost. Find your reason at Rancho Milagro Recovery. We can help you in your darkest hour if you call us at (951) 526-4582. Rancho Milagro provides detox and inpatient treatment administered by dedicated staff to help you overcome addiction and find the light. In addition to individual and group counseling, we also offer animal therapy, yoga, art, and music therapy, and hiking and horseback riding to help you learn more about yourself and the ways that you matter. We understand the value of each life, and we want to help you find your reasons to stay. Demonstrate your self-worth by coming for treatment at our Temecula, California ranch. We can help you see why you are worth it.